All the cool things to do in all the cool cities of America this week. Now featuring our newest 1%mujahid, drowlett, royally screwing up his report on the week in Los Angeles.
TERMINAL: ON MORTALITY AND BEAUTY – If you’re in need of a remedy for your excitement in order to function and whatnot, try this photo exhibit of dead animals (including people). One of these photographers actually raised animals to eat each other and shot the moments of their respective deaths. – MONDAY-SATURDAY, Photographic Center Northwest, 12:00-9:00 pm, $FREE
LIAM GALLAGHER – Did u no former Oasis frontman Liam Gallagher plays some pub in Pike Place every Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday? I’m gonna go on Tuesday and cry to “Wonderwall.” – TUESDAY, Kell’s Irish Restaurant & Pub, 9:00 pm, 21+, $FREE
GLENGARRY GLEN ROSS – Complete the cycle of despair you started at “Terminal” by watching a bunch of old dudes screw each other over in this classic “comedy” by David Mamet. Bring yr brass balls. – FRIDAY & SATURDAY, Lakewood Playhouse, Lakewood, 8:00 pm, $25
[insert Portland photo here, s.s. you big loser]
NW FILM FEST – The International Film Festival is actually abt 2 weeks long so I will probably tell you to got to it every week cuz I’m lazy like that. In all seriousness, it’s a rly amazing festival every year and the NW film center is an amazing organization. – ALL DAMN WEEK, @ various locations in pdx. Small amounts of $
BLAZERS V. SUNS – Aight we all no Lillard should have been an all-star cuz he’s dope as fuck and playing way better than KD rn. And the Blazers are in a bit of rough stretch, but this is about to be a good game and, shit, they’re not always going to be this good so see it while you can. THURSDAY, @ Moda Center, $-$$$ idk depends where u sit dummy.
LATE NIGHT LIBRARY – R u looking for a chill time? Literary Arts readings are definitely a chill time. Robin Black is actually pretty good and readings are actually kind of boring, but whatever, you won’t feel like a loser when it’s over. ALSO THURSDAY (i would go to the blazers game) @ Literary Arts $5 suggested donation (lol).
GOODFOOT FIRST FRIDAY SUPER JAM – The title definitely says it all. If you like dancing (r u awkward or something?) and you like dancing to seventies soul / funk than this is the place for u. @ Goodfoot 2845 stark, 9pm, $5 @ the door.
[insert LA photo here, drowlett, you lameo]
LOS ANGELES [drowlett]
I’m new to this whole thing, is this what I’m going to do this week or just general things that are going on in my city? Either way, terrible idea for a blog. Oh well, in the name of content generating I’ll do it.
Jackson Tanner – My new #fav country band just had a residency at the Echo. I believe its over though. Sad. So more of a shout out than information.
TWIN CITIES [btbt]
CELEBRATE ETERNAL SEAHAWKS GLORY – Gonna take a cue from cultural hero Marshawn “Beast Mode” Lynch and say nothing about this but “biscuits and gravy.” – ALL WEEK, everywhere, 24/7, $FREE oh wait nevermind. u mad @david grohl?? / fvk a 12th man. OK thank God I can stop pretending to care about football now.
WRITING THE 1% JIHAD MANUAL OF STYLE – I wrote the OK WEEK section of the 1% Jihad formatting manual out really explicitly last week but still no one follows it. Except gallons but we aren’t speaking rn b/c everyone in his city is a SORE LOSER so I don’t want to say anything nice about him. Come on though guys, put the event title in BOLD. – NOT AN EVENT, no location, still gonna adhere to format b/c I care – $ANITY [gallons, note the DASH before price – you are close to attaining perfection but still not there.]
DR. DOG W/ PHOX – I don’t like this band but my friend who lives in New York now does a lot and I like her so I will tell you that a band she likes is playing and maybe you will like them too. – FRIDAY, First Ave., 8:00 pm, 18+ – $18/$22.
PEPPERS & FRIES – My expectations for this new restaurant are probably even lower than yours. It’s hard to imagine a world where a new restaurant on Lake Street called Peppers & Fries is good. But maybe we are living in it. Wouldn’t that be awesome? – 3900 E Lake St., 11-12 / 11-1 weekend – $5.95 (fries), $??? (peppers). <<<look at this guy, following all his own formatting rules, like a total baus – g.
[Insert BK photo here, bartleby, you putz, or we’re all going to have to look at a dead cow all week]
There is nothing happening in Brooklyn this week because it’s too expensive.